December 2023
Jessica Skyfield
fieldsky@gmail.com
fieldsky@gmail.com
Bio Note: The holidays have such expectations surrounding them. This time of gaiety and supposed fellowship doesn't always feel like that, for many different reasons for various people. These often highly individualized personal experiences (queue: bad memories) can be stressful for people, because we're all supposed to be happy around the holidays. & I do remember a time when I liked holidays, so it's very bittersweet for me to have bad associations with them; & yet, here we are. & that can be its own sadness loop. I'll try to shine what little candle I have & keep on keepin' on, holding on to hope.
Merry, merry meh-mess.
Merry, merry meh-mess.
quit(e) contrary,
how does your garden grow?
With spite and hate & sometimes a rake,
though I've tired of tending it now.
As I toil with trifles & troubles,
my vision becomes dimmer
& tangents grab for my attention.
I order packages online & make cakes with poison,
because that's just what you do.
I willingly ingest a known
neuro & hepatotoxin for fun, jollies,
because that's also what you do–celebrate! Prost! Salud!
The air is so dry & electricity fills the air;
I need a hole to crawl into, to stay humidity controlled & warm.
“It's always something.”
Will I miss my mother?
Do you miss me?
Crux / Crutch / Cross
to bare,
“Yes, Merry, very,” said the Grinch.
Merry, merry meh-mess.
Except my heart is caught in a vice,
pinched so tight it can’t grow any sizes any day.
Maybe one day.
©2023 Jessica Skyfield