Although he has the face
grandmas and mamas
pinch and pray
their daughters will marry,
in his black jumper
and gray sweater, his body
fattened up by his German
grandma and mama
who dote on this first born
of a farmer and a housewife,
shows he is no prima donna.

His eyes are used to the dark
and his nose tells him
something stinks, but he
doesn’t know it’s him.
He thinks it is normal
to live without electricity
or running water 
and to get hosed off
at the car wash next door
when his father thinks
he smells too bad. 

He pays no attention
to the stuffed bear plopped
beside him because he
is fascinated by the flashing
light that bursts out
of the big box on a stick
that makes him blink.
He doesn’t know that
at only a few months old
when he gazes into the lens
he is looking into his future.
                        

He is two years old
and his grandfather
is taking a nap
in a large wooden box
in his living room,
packed with strangers
dressed in black.
He is pouting and running
around like a wind-up toy. 
He wants his grandfather
to wake up and pick him up
and tickle his belly
with his beard. He wants
all those people to go away
so his mother will pay
attention to him. Most of all
he wants his grandmother
to stop wailing because
it is hurting his ears 
and making him cry.
                        

He is grilling hamburgers
in his back yard and his
mother is in the kitchen
when the policeman
hands him a telegram.
He shivers in the sunshine
as he tells his mother, 
younger sister and brother,
Dad’s dead. Ejected
from his rig on the highway.
A pea farmer in a truck cut him off.
Massive head injuries.

He’ll never forget 
his uncle driving him
and his brother
to the accident scene
and stopping at a house
and introducing him
to the other driver, 
who answers the door
without so much as a scratch,
Boys meet the man who killed
your father.

Or his mother shouting,
You’re worthless 
and will never amount
to anything, when his
salary doesn’t cover
the bills. So when the
job offer comes, he is off
to Montana in his 1961
Chevy to prove her wrong.