One Time Deal


I sat on the edge of the bed
and talked to her
More honestly than I ever have:

You know, in a way I would like to go back to work, be with people to a certain degree again — but if I did, it would mean that I had failed, all these years since I started writing, all the pain, the drinking, the finding out finally who I am and the reasons why, all that would just mean it was for nothing. I am not sure I can live with that.

She didn't say anything,
but I guess nobody had ever talked to her like that before
and I am guessing no one ever will again. 





The Frog and the Scorpion


Absolutely nothing matters.
Say those first words that come into your mind;
they show your true nature
who you really are.
Don't hold back on that — 
let it out — and
see where you end up.

First thought — best thought.
Second thought — censorship.





Don't Follow the Crowd


What is it 
that you are afraid of?
Living?
Dying?
Your friends won't love you anymore?

What is it that stops you from doing what you want?
Fear of being alone?
Fear of being a failure?
Fear of rejection?
Fear that no one will understand what you write?
All of the above?

Let it all go.
Because all these people
really really don't care what you do.





Compassion


I went to the train station
for no particular reason.
All the trains from Waterloo were canceled.
On the screen it said
someone had jumped in front of a train.

I walked outside
and a woman was on the phone.
You'd think they could scrape up the remains and carry on.

I laughed at her compassion
and she walked off.





Red Face


I see the young woman
I saw earlier.
Her face was red with the cold then — 
now she has warmed up.
She sits next to me
in the coffee shop.
I would love to talk to her.
I look at her for a while
but say nothing — 
just like always.