August 2015
I love to laugh and make other people laugh. When my kids were little I made up silly stories for them — and then turned them into songs. Now I write poetry and short stories, all humorous. I've created a Zombie advice columnist, Hideous Hilda, who counsels needy zombies. I’ve also created a character called Anxietyman who always 'saves the day' even though he’s a neurotic nervous wreck. (Yes. I based him on me...) My poems and stories have been published online and in print.
Dancing with Irony
I get where I’m going
By going nowhere—
Fathoming the stars
With my vacant stare.
How serious am I
While making a pun—
Laughing out loud
Yet, having no fun.
I feel overjoyed
In the midst of pain—
Clutching my wits
While going insane.
Together I hold it
As I tear at the seams—
Dancing with irony
Between the extremes.
Beach Bums
Begging and panhandling on street corners,
scrounging and rummaging through trash,
mooching and freeloading on the boardwalk,
scouring your every move at outdoor restaurants --
Better think twice about leaving your personal
belongings on the blanket while you go for a swim.
It’s no surprise to see the leeches scoping you out
at the bath house.
Broad daylight is no deterrent for their brash and
brazen behavior.
It means absolutely nothing to them.
Damn seagulls!
Drunk Musicians
Tickling the ivories when your brain is pickled
is like shuffling cards with your feet.
Strumming a six string when you’re half in the bag
is like cutting a knife with your meat.
Banging on drums when you’ve had quite a few,
is like bobbing for crocodiles.
Drunk musicians like the sound of their music --
It all sounds good after a while.
©2015 Brian Horsethief